The Martian Doorway

The Martian Doorway

There was an intriguing formation photographed by the Curiosity rover. Give it time and it will be up there with the Face on Mars and the Nazca Lines.

I found out about this at 2:00 am and quickly pounded this out. My late-night state of mind kind of shows:

Reuters News Service, Houston Texas, 5:20 pm CDT.

NASA Director, Galeraraack the Banth Devourer: The apparent doorway is most likely just a shear fracture due to some recent temblors. In all probability, the anomaly is only a few centimeters tall and is in no way the five-hundred-foot-high entrance to the Blood Sacrifice Temple of Sacred Hekkador of the Therns.

Jan Simpson:  Mister Galeraraack, Jan Simpson, She/Her, ABC News I was wondering…

Galeraraack the Banth Devourer:  My preferred pronoun is “Master.”  And do not assume my gender.  It is beyond your puny comprehension.

Jan Simpson: I’m sorry Ma… um.. Sorry. I was wondering if you would… Gosh, I know this will sound silly, but it is going to come up.  Would you comment on this being any kind of indication of life on Mars?

Galeraraack the Banth Devourer (throwing all four of his arms wide and bellowing with laughter, his tusks shining brightly):  There is indeed no life at all to be found upon the blessed sands of Barsoom. Your stupidity is past all imagining.  Foolish teller of childish lies.

Jan Simpson: Well, you work for the government too!

Hermione Joplin-Cabot: Hermione Joplin-Cabot She/Her, MSNBC, Master Galeraraack…

Galeraraack the Banth Devourer: Your validation and submissiveness pleases Galeraraack the Banth Devourer, rest assured you shall be spared in the coming Blood Storm, and your place in my breeding pens is secured.

Hermione Joplin-Cabot: Sucks to be you, Jan!

Jan SimpsonBitch.

Hermione Joplin-CabotSlut. Master Galeraraack, there are rumors that the administration is strongly considering pursuing your unilateral nuclear disarmament plan of detonating all of Earth’s nuclear weapons on the surface of Venus.  Would you care to comment…Mas-s-s-ter?

Jan Simpson: God Hermione! Lay it on with a trowel, why don’t you?

Galeraraack the Banth Devourer: The Addle Minded White-Haired One is indeed wisely receptive to my brilliant plan of using your nuclear weaponry to carpet bomb the planet Venus’s continent of Ishtar.  This is a perfectly safe thing to do as Cosoom is as completely and utterly lifeless as holy Barsoom. And it will be even more so when this plan comes to fruition.

Thank you all. That is all the questions I will answer at this time; insolent Hoomans.  You are all dismissed.  Hermione, meet me in my germination chamber, wear the Gryffindor costume.

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