Uncategorized Archives - Page 82 of 130

21JunJune 21, 2022

Yeah, It’s Gonna Suck – Monster High The (Live Action) Movie

They should have hired cosplayers for this thing.Today’s post was done at the urgent and enraged request of the Eldest Dark Spawn. From Nickelodeon and Paramount +, the one-two punch of suck comes Monster High - The Movie. This is going to be a live-action version of the toy/video cross-over series from about ten years ago. I can’t fault the original business model as it handily had its way with my wallet whenever I made the financially ill-considered journey to Toys R’ Us. The...

By The Dark HeraldUncategorized

20JunJune 20, 2022

To Bankruptcy And Beyond!

$51 million domestic, Lightyear is officially a bomb.Disney had no idea this was coming and is trying to figure out what went wrong.Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! (*gasp...wheez...gasp*) Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! This flick was supposed to be Pixar's slamdunk and honestly if they had hired the writer's from the TV series they would have had one, no problem.From Bounding Into Comics"The film failed to dethrone Jurassic World: Dominion, which brought in $58.6 million in its second weekend at the box office. Earlier...

By The Dark HeraldUncategorized

17JunJune 17, 2022

It’s Worse Than I Thought – Lightyear

You weren't planning to see it anyway and you are right to avoid it.This film is a Pedomouse spectacular. Lightyear is a product of Reimagine Tomorrow. The lesbian kiss was the least of it. The entire film is centered around the lesbian relationship. In fact the lesbians get pregnant. So, forget about awkward questions from your seven year old about two women in love. Pedomouse wants you to have discussions about how two women can get each...

By The Dark HeraldUncategorized

15JunJune 15, 2022

Embarrassing Admission

I seriously overestimated the main writer of Obi-Wan Kenobi. One of the main features of this show has been Reee-va’s grudge against Obi-Wan. You were supposed to guess at her motivation for wanting to kill him. And it now turns out that this show would have been much better off with any of your guesses then the writer's answer.The first scene in this entire show is a bunch of Younglings practicing their lightsaber drills. Then order 66 kicks off. Their teacher is killed, and the...

By The Dark HeraldUncategorized

14JunJune 14, 2022

The Broken Drinker

I feel your pain dudeDisney's upcoming list of Star Wars and Marvel's curatated, homogenized entertainment products left the Critical Drinker reeeling in horror. He was a broken man at the end of it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KEA8z2lwBqg Now compare AZ's list with the BS list that The Nerd Crew invented five years ago. Back then most of the projects Red Letter Media predicted hadn't even been announced yet.. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o3K44GQwxbA&t=487s

By The Dark HeraldUncategorized

14JunJune 14, 2022

The Flash Problem

Warner Brothers is too deeply into Ezra Miller’s Flash movie to just shelf it. That appears to be an option that is off the table. The problem is that Ezra Miller has gone from bad boy to public pedophile. If you can’t keep that shit under wraps, Hollywood has no use or respect for you. Not these days anyway. The statement that Miller’s groomee made that was supposed to make her sound like she was simply a young woman with her own agency, following her...

By The Dark HeraldUncategorized

13JunJune 13, 2022

The Dark Herald Was Right, Naturally

I appear to be one of maybe five people who saw this coming.“This attack was so sudden I have to wonder, did Bob Chapek talk Ron DeSantis into it? I have no doubt whatsoever that Bob Chapek is the one who leaked the Reimagine Tomorrow videos clips to Christopher Ruffo. He wants Reimagine Tomorrow destroyed. Right now, it’s protected by the Board of Directors, but they will be facing a shareholder revolt if this thing trashes Disney’s stock price. What would Chapek get...

By The Dark HeraldUncategorized

10JunJune 10, 2022

A Song of Grod Chapters

DISCUSS AT THE ARKHAVEN BLOGThese are the completed chapters for A Song of Grod. Yes, I know they are pretty raw. That is because this is a raw first draft.For those of you who have been asking about this here it is.UPDATE: Click on the first chapter if you are curious. You'll know if it's for you pretty quickly.Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8 Chapter 9 Chapter...

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09JunJune 9, 2022

Blogs and Ends: The Low Hanging Fruit Edition

You guessed it, I'm busy today.So you get some driveby speed blogging.FIRSTHere is the first of the (*long tired sigh*) Disney Predator movies. It's called Predator Prey. The director is a Bad Reboot alumnus. What could possibly go wrong? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wZ7LytagKlc I'll say this, if the story had been about a young Brave and there were no whites in it, then there might have been an interesting concept to found here somewhere.As it is, I guarantee this will be...

By The Dark HeraldUncategorized

09JunJune 9, 2022

How Did LucasFilm Make Something This Stupid

Just as a reminder, here is Leia's message to Obi-Wan Kenobi. Does this look like someone with an established relationship? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8N_Cj3ZS9-A "General Kenobi, years ago you served my father in the... Oh, forget all that crap! Ben, it's me. Remember all the times you saved my ass nine years ago? We-l-l-l..."Is Leia going to get a memory wipe at the end of this? Okay, that does mean this entire show was a waste of time (which it is) but that...

By The Dark HeraldUncategorized